Looking back on my YTT journey: Phyllis
My YTT journey is so so so special to me. Where do I even begin? My loveliest YTT batch mates — Kim, Jia Min, Wei Ying, Shu Yan, Shi Qi, and Mable, adding on to the ever- growing list of wonderful humans I have met in my yoga journey. Not forgetting Sue, who was unfortunately unable to complete this YTT journey together with us due to personal reasons. This one is for you, Sue. Looking back, we have really grown so much and on top of that, we even did a YTT amid a pandemic. I think we’re so damn incredible for that! It really was not easy doing this YTT with so many Covid-19 restrictions in place and I was really bummed out with some of the last-minute changes though I knew they were for the sake of keeping everyone safe. I initially wanted to keep my last blog post happy, but I came to realize that life will not always be full of ups. There will be ups and downs and I’m definitely still learning to allow myself space to feel my feelings just as they are during the downs. My YTT journey was truly one filled with self-discovery as Jessica encouraged my individuality to shine through my own teaching. While I was previously confined by my own definition of how yoga teachers should be, I am truly grateful to say that I no longer am. I have learned to embrace my individuality as a yoga teacher, and I embody that in my teaching. Jessica is truly a very special individual, and I am beyond blessed to have had the chance to be trained by her. The life advice and teachings that she has gifted me will always be kept close to my heart, along with the memories and experiences made throughout this YTT. Thank you, Jessica! I would also like to take this chance to thank Alexis for supporting us silently and to reminisce on my first meeting with Alexis at the studio when I decided to sign up for the YTT. For patiently answering my questions and for giving me the last bit of confidence I needed to make up my mind to sign up for this YTT, thank you. This YTT has been one hell of a ride, juggling other commitments while doing strength drills every day, learning Sanskrit, creating yoga sequences, and more. I struggled so much and yet learned so much more. If I were given a choice to turn back time, I would still choose to do this YTT all over again. Every time. Phyllis 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
I get by with a little help from my friends: Weiying
It seems a little fitting to close this chapter of my yoga journey by mentioning the people in it. These are the people that continue to inspire me, make me look forward to class every weekend, and are a definitive component of my growth. I have likened each of them to an asana. Shiqi – Vrikshasana (Tree Pose) Stands up tall, but very grounded. Provides respite for anyone who comes her way. Mabel – Uttana Shishosana (Extended Puppy Pose) This is an asana we would relish in after a series of painful sequences, because it releases whatever tension we were holding prior. An asana just like Mabsy. Kim – Astavakrasana (Eight Angle Pose) I don’t think anyone in our class can talk about Kim without mentioning her lovely arms. Just looking at her biceps inspires us all to be stronger. Of course, on a more personal level, she is one of the first people I made friends with, the both of us sitting opposite each other on the first day of class. The groundedness in her rubs off on me, and I always find myself comforted by her presence. Jiamin – Vikasita Kamalasana (Blossoming Lotus Pose) A flower that never stops blooming, a spirit that never stops kindling. Phyllis – Camatkarasana (Wild Thing) Shining her heart outwards for everyone, a kind being who spreads lots of good vibes. Shuyan – Garudasana (Eagle Pose) A strong and powerful force wrapped in an elegant and compact figure. Sue – Adho Mukha Vrksasana (Handstand) Sue was one of the first to get into the pose; she was always fearless, taking a leap of faith every time she attempted this inversion. Jessica – Natarajasana (Lord of the Dance Pose) Always embracing us with her generosity, love and beauty. Jess has managed to create a fun and safe space for us. Alexis – Virabhadrasana I (Warrior I) An impenetrable fortress, silently keeping vigil and always picking up the slack whenever the chips are down. I feel fortunate to learn with, and from, these people. Thank you Yoga Mandala. Weiying 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
No Homework, No Yoga: Weiying
To ensure our maximum progress during the course of YTT, we were given daily homework drills by Jess to strengthen our bodies. This week was the first week since we first started that we hadn’t had any homework from her. Jess probably wanted to give us more time to prepare our teaching sequences, and study for our upcoming exam, I don’t know. I didn’t ask – heehee. And somehow, it feels very natural. My body didn’t cry out for any stretches or drills. The days pass and suddenly it’s Friday and I’ve not done much yoga practice. I decided to do a few sun salutations to feel better about myself. And wow, my hamstrings grew tighter, I couldn’t bend as low as before in Uttanasana, and my limbs ached a little the day after. It is indeed scary to know that without supervision, this may very likely be how I throw my yoga education away. With no Jess to remind us to do work, no regular meeting with mates of the same purpose, will I still want to keep up with my yoga practice? This involves a complete lifestyle change, right down to the little choices that I make daily – if I want to snooze for another 15 minutes or get a few sun salutations in to start the day. It’s beginning to sink in. To start building a conscious effort in wanting to seek betterment. No external force needed, it all starts from within. In two weeks, we would have graduated. And this is where the real training starts. I choose to let YTT be a springboard to a healthier life, instead of letting it be just a highlight of 2021. Weiying 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
Yoga slowly seeping into my life: Weiying
I realise how much I like to lean on things. No, seriously. As I go deeper into my yoga practice, which constantly reminds me to keep an active stretch in various parts of my body (especially the spine), I discovered for myself just how lazy my posture can be when I think no one is looking. I lean against the wash basin when I brush my teeth. I lean against the counter when I prepare my morning coffee. And when there’s nothing to lean against, I collapse into my lower back (another form of leaning too, actually). I slouch while checking my phone. I sink into one leg as I wait in line at NTUC. I’m reminded of a question our dear friend Phyllis asked one day during class. “When should we engage our root chakra?” she asked. “From the moment you wake up,” replied Jess. It sounds awfully tiring at first. To squeeze various parts of your body as you go about the mundanity of life. But with regular practice I realise that it is possible for me to make it a habit, I just have to get used to it. Which is why I have started to take notice of my sloth-like body. And when I do, I make tiny adjustments to better align my body. And suddenly I become a lot more present, and I walk a little differently. Yoga is slowly changing the way I move around, it’s seeping into the little cracks of my daily actions. I’m grateful, really. Without constantly collapsing into my body / nearby surfaces, it has helped me shift towards a healthier state of mind where I believe that I alone can ground myself, without the need for a random wall to lean against. Weiying 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
Yoga – the elixir of youth and beauty: Weiying
It’s no secret that exercise gives you that rosy glow, and generates endorphins that make you feel happy and look the best version of yourself. But I believe yoga is one of the few practices out there that gives you a head to toe makeover, both inside and out. I have not been doing yoga long enough to witness its profound effects, but I do have an inkling of what yoga may offer in the long run: Redness in cheeks – forget the blusher, do inversions and forward folds. They’re bound to get your blood pumping happily from the bottom of your feet all the way to the crown of your head. That dullness in your complexion will slowly dissipate with regular practice. Confidence – incorporate advanced poses / progressions into your daily practice. The confidence you get from surmounting these poses will give you all the confidence you need. You will begin to find a sense of grounding within yourself, believing in your own abilities and striving to scale higher mountains at each turn. And there’s nothing more attractive than someone with confidence. Posture – Need I say more on this? So many poses in yoga reminds us to stretch the spine; we extend it, rotate it, side bend it. Definitely helps with a healthy posture. Major detox – doing yoga without the air conditioning on is a sure fire way to get yourself dripping with sweat, bringing with it all the toxins drawn from your body, leaving you cleansed and healthy. Yoga – one of the best makeup there ever is. Disclaimer: The opinions stated do not represent that of Yoga Mandala, they are gathered from my experiences alone. Weiying 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
Breath: Weiying
I’m beginning to really enjoy our pranayama practice. I feel really supported by my breath afterwards. Whenever an asana proves too difficult to hold onto, I can always count on my breath to give me a little support. I’m now a little more attuned to the slight changes in my breathing, and one thing I’ve come to realise is that my breath is largely influenced by my thoughts. I could never betray it. When all is fine and dandy, I’m relaxed, and my breath is steady. But when negativity sets in, my breath becomes sporadic, shallow, my heart starts to beat faster, and anxiety sets in. As someone with chronic asthma, I’ve come to accept my condition as a way of life. And steroid inhalants are what I turn to for breath support. But discovering the various ways of breathing, and what it can do for my lung capacity and consequently my health, has opened up a whole new world for me. I’m glad I now have a few tools in the bag to help me with my breath. I especially like Ujjayi, Kapalbhati and Nadi Shodana. Being able to hear my breath, and feel it travelling up my nose and all the way down to my stomach, and then coming up again through my nose, brings me much comfort. It’s ironic how the one thing that gives us life, isn’t quite visible to the eye. We don’t even notice it half the time, and when we finally do, it’s usually because we could not keep up with it. It’s assuring to know that while I’m alive, my breath will never forsake me, and I can always come back to myself by focusing on it. I wish I could say I’m completely off the artificial support of inhalants, but unfortunately, I’m not. One day though, I will, slowly but surely. And I know that when that happens, I will be buoyed up by my breath. Weiying 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
When unsure, turn to Yoga: Weiying
Today I managed to do an inversion – pincha mayurasana. What surprised me was that when I finally brought myself up, it didn’t come as much of a surprise. In fact, with all things considered, it shouldn’t even come as a surprise, because of all the prior drills and preparatory asanas we did. In my heart of hearts, I knew I would get up there eventually. I just didn’t trust in myself enough. Pessimism can be such a disease. It eats away at your self confidence and you think yourself a lesser being. Every attempted kickup into the inversion, I tell myself it’s too scary, I shouldn’t do it, I’ll get hurt, I’ll break something. And this is in addition to all the reminders Jess was lovingly piping from the side – tuck your ribs, tuck your tailbone, remember this, try not to do that…can you imagine how noisy it gets in the head? But after weeks of failed attempts my mind got too tired of all the noise. One day in class, I simply followed the instructions to align my body – which provided a temporary respite for my frantic brain – I kicked up, and there I was, looking at the world from another angle. A sweet sweet feeling. I wonder what other goals are within our reach if we just did the steps that led up to it (with intention, of course), instead of letting our anxieties hold us back. If we simply trusted in the process and let things fall how they may. Of course it helps tons to have a good guide in Jess, as well as the support of your mates. No man’s an island, and having a great support system sure goes a long way. Yoga may not be the answer to everything, but I’m beginning to see how it can offer a source of centering (both philosophically and physically) within ourselves in times of uncertainty. Weiying 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
The End but not Really? – Shi Qi
The sixth and last stage of my YTT experience can be termed as “The End but not Really?”, which is felt at the last few weeks of the YTT (I really managed to name them all, kudos to occupational hazard). YUP, teaching weeks are here and along that comes with it are exams and graduation! Having completed life’s first ever yoga teaching over Zoom, it is definitely an experience! Not just the practicality of it because you never know how the restrictions are going to be like, but alas, the preparation work that goes into a Zoom class is not any lesser than a physical class. Coupled with the limitations of virtual teaching, it certainly trains you to be a clear and effective instruction deliverer. As the number of COVID cases increase, virtual teaching has replaced physical teaching yet again! While this serves to safeguard our safety, the fact that we are not seeing each other for two weeks is not a welcoming thought (yes, overly attached much). Fingers crossed to be able to have graduation day together! As I move on to this stage, there is definitely a sense of goal achievement and feeling of progression from Day One. However, all these comes along with this phenomenon of the “Arrival Fallacy” (worth a google) whereby you have this illusion that you will achieve ultimate happiness when you reached your goal. Sure, the thought of having weekends back for sleeping in or any other activities does sounds pretty awesome but there is also this nagging thought that “hmmm, what am I going to be doing during weekends from now on…..” The thought of having more time on hand is tempting but on the other hand, I wonder when I will have such discipline and physical strength again… (**disclaimer: just taking a lil break in between, not totally slacking yea). So yes, this concludes the six stages of my YTT, as I have very much personally coined them. Namaste! Shi Qi 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
Adrenaline and Rush: Shi Qi
The fifth stage of my YTT experience can be termed as “Adrenaline and Rush”. Adrenaline coming from the recognition that teaching weeks are impending, assignments are soon to be due and more so, the need to switch from current student mode to teaching mode pretty soon (*send some help). Besides sequences that needs to flow, I am proud to say that we have started thinking of regressions and progressions. Something that I never thought I will be doing as I am so attuned to the student role of doing that pose correctly. Yes, the mindset shift somewhat still boggles me but hey, it is possible! What makes all these a lot better is definitely the sessions on understanding different body types, physical adjustment class and starting on the assignments soon to help pace yourself given the other commitments that you may have (I know it is hard!). Procrastination is arguably the greater nemesis at this point in time :S Well, there is always a silver lining in everything, including this adrenaline rush! Thankfully, being in an YTT with a group of like-minded people and seeing how hard they worked throughout does inspire you to get started. It’s like there is this subtle (or not so subtle) reminder when you see others taking instructional videos, posting on social media and bonus: offering to help you with positioning the camera, pressing that record button, assuring you that it is okay as many shots as you need to or filming alongside with you (thanks ladies <3). Perhaps it is that sense of working hard together; as I type here right now, I am somewhat thinking how am I at my fifth blogpost already.. Isn’t it just moments ago that I was lamenting how long it will take to get these six blogposts out… Shi Qi 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
Disbelief and Reminiscence: Shi Qi
The fourth stage of my YTT experience can be termed as “Disbelief and Reminiscence”. By now, we have downloaded and accepted Sanskrits into our system and teaching as part of our lives. As we go through drills and morning sequences, we started to laugh at some novel ways of pronouncing the Sanskrits as well as discovering how hard it is to differentiate left from right. But alas, the teaching of sequences became smoother and now, we start to expose ourselves to the other different poses that we never knew existed. They say “too many cooks spoil the broth” but not in this case! It was definitely so much of help learning new poses and sequences from one another rather than going through each of them ourselves. It definitely felt super surreal to go from learning one single pose to teaching a sequence to learning other poses to coming up with my own sequence that I will be teaching. And as we progressed into all these exciting stuff, someone commented during lunch that: “Oh my god! We are more than half way through YTT!!”. Yes, it suddenly dawned on me that excluding teaching, exam and graduation week, we actually do not have much of practicing time together. Not sure who it was, but someone begin reminiscing about the past few weeks of YTT during lunch and other chipped in. initially in my “hey-guys-its-too-early-for this” mode, but I soon joined in the fun and oh boy, we did went through quite a fair bit together huh? We laughed, joked, related about our first impressions of one another in the first few weeks so naturally that if felt like we just enrolled in this YTT.. In this sense, I don’t think I will need to additionally explain how this fourth stage is being termed yea? Shi Qi 200HR YTT Jul’21 Weekend
