I Am On The Way… – Jane, RYT200
Today is our batch’s graduation day. So it took me about 2 hours to come up with the title and theme and yet, it feels wrong. I am not ready to end the YTT course yet – perhaps someone is playing a huge prank on me – it can’t possibly be at the end of Week 5 of the course. I am still a beginner. Thinking back to a conversation I had whilst debating options for the 5 weeks I had. I wanted to do something that would just be meaningful for me. Not learning French and German for my husband, not travelling all over the world to see friends. Just something for me, myself and I. Oh boy did I get to know myself beyond all expectations on my 1 sqm mat: I can do inversion poses (given the knowledge, wisdom and discipline): Starting my YTT day 1 with practically no arm muscles, I now am a lover of crow, firefly and headstand. I am an introvert (shocking): For years I thought of myself as an extrovert despite all personality tests telling me otherwise. But during the 5 weeks, I realised I am always more comfortable focusing on my own inner thoughts and ideas, rather than what’s happening externally. I am disciplined, despite years of believing otherwise. My specialty is the morning alarm snooze, I have really excelled at postponing my wakeup time to the very very last second that it has to be some sort of an art form. But on my 1 sqm of yoga mat, I have found the strength to just do one more drill even when my non-existent abs are shaking in excruciating pain. I have found the joy of discipline, it doesn’t have to be grand, it simply lies in the fact that I showed up every day and gave no petty excuses. Was there a couple of lazy child’s poses here and there? Sure, especially when Jess wasn’t looking but hey, it’s incredibly hard to keep one’s mula banda engaged at all times! But this is not all, I am first and foremost, most grateful to my teacher Jess, my inversion after class tutor Alexis, and all my batch yogi friends. You have blessed me in ways I cannot describe and cannot thank you enough for. I have ticked all the boxes for what I wanted to get out of the course when I signed up: Learn how to do the poses and the theory of yoga Make friends and have my own yogi community Be disciplined and show up every day. If possible, some sort of inversion Now, with all the knowledge about yoga, and myself, I have more questions than answers. It’s okay though, I know I am on the way. I may have just gotten off the train, but the yoga journey has just begun for me. Jane 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
Pratyahara – Be In The World But Not Of The World -Jane, RYT200
“If you were of the world, the world would love its own; but because you are not of the world, but I chose you out of the world, because of this the world hates you.” John 15:19 I have always pondered on the biblical idea of “being in the world but not of the world”. To me, “being in the world” only applied to my physical location which is currently the tropical oasis of Singapore. It is well curated, clean and safe but not without its own stressful ways. Our senses are bombarded by external stimulants for the entirety of our waking hours. The brain sees, smells, listens, tastes, touches and thinks incessantly. Even during our sleep, our mind’s eye beholds our life’s drama and imaginations. An average internet user now spends an est. 7 hours every day across all platforms according to research (link). Our brains are not evolved to process constant stimulation – more specifically being in the constant fight or flight state. The world around me seems to equate “being busy” to “being desired”. I was no different, having lived in 4 countries within 5 years for work, FOMO was a pretty big theme in my life. During week 3 of the YTT course, I had a friend visiting from the UK and he mentioned a group ski trip in France! I expected myself to start impulsively checking flights and succumb to the power of FOMO. But that didn’t happen. Sure I would’ve loved to catch up with friends but deep down, I felt a deep sense of relief. I had completely grown out of the drink-till-you-drop London lifestyle. In fact, over the last two years, I grew to relish the “not so busy” weekends thanks to lockdowns. Instead of constantly doing, I was forced to think and spend time with myself. And what YTT gifted me was the elevation from just day dreaming to focused pondering of the self discovery journey. I do catch myself wondering what if I become “of the world” again once I start work in one week’s time? Well, worries have no end and now that I have seen and touched the door to my soul’s garden, I will find the way again. It had always been there. And always will be. Jane 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
Pranayama and Dhyana – The Love Within -Jane, RYT200
The YTT experience at The Yoga Mandala has just been full of positive and emotional surprises. But since the very first class, , I have made a startling discovery of myself – I LOVE breath work and guided meditation. I wouldn’t say I hated pranayama or meditation prior to the experience, but 2 out of 3 times, I would leave early or arrive 5 min late to a class just so that I can swiftly avoid all the “close your eyes, focus on your breathing and meditate on one thought” nonsense. No offence to all my past teachers, but honestly, the corporate Jane was trained to look for “excellence” which meant high “productivity”. And that meant multitasking. In fact, focusing on any one thought for more than 30 seconds, would just be the exact opposite of “productivity”. I mean, come on, I could’ve scrolled over at least 2 youtube short videos and squeezed in 3 insta stories. My mind was a jungle. What made the pranayama & dhyana experience so different during the YTT? Well, to start off, Jess explained what they actually meant – both the literal meaning, the purposes and where they fit in the 8 limbs of yoga. Suddenly, pranayama, the expansion of life forces, made sense. It carries not just the air to fuel our organs, it carries the very awareness that brings meaning to life. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t attain nirvana from day 1 at TYM (and probably wouldn’t want to include that as the goal of my yoga practice). In fact, thinking back, the lack of a loo break just before we took a 10 min Ujjayi pranayama was probably God’s way of focusing my mind on one thought (yup for me, it was the bladder). But that was not the only thing I felt, there was also dizziness as I struggled to make the ocean sound during inhalation. But slowly, my chest started to rise, my rib cages felt pressed against the side of my sports wear and my tummy was filled with air (not carbs) for once. And that was addictive. 10 minutes felt like 2 minutes or maybe even just 1 minute? And when my eyes opened, I couldn’t help but smile. I knew I was at the right place at the right time and doing the right thing. Once I felt the piercing mental clarity and the engrossing warmth of my inner self, it is something that cannot be unfelt. The sense awakens and it’s looking for more. And throughout the month, after many more pranayamas and guided dhyanas, it then became clear to me, the awareness of our body, mind and soul, is self love. The universe blessed us with a world inside waiting to be discovered. And if we are lucky, we can live our entire life inside there, I’d like to make it a dazzling place to be. 🙂 Jane 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
Drishti – Gazing Point -Jane, RYT200
“Where your eyes go, your mind follows” – Jess @ The Yoga Mandala So what do I frequently look at on a typical day? The answers are hardly surprising, it’s our standard modern life essentials – phones and laptops. I spent hours replying to work emails, and when I was off work, Netflix and other social media immersion was how I used to decompress. I was often absorbed in imaginary lives that had nothing to do with mine. My mind and thoughts were consumed by the apathy and misery that reeked out of most work emails and the seemingly perfect lives lived on screens. Rarely did my eyes catch a break from the hustle and bustle of the outside world and little was my awareness on the matter. It wasn’t until after the first week of the YTT200 course that I realised my screen time had dramatically reduced and I no longer felt the constant urge to retreat to a world inside screens. Dristhi is the Sanskrit term loosely translated to a focused gaze, meant for developing concentrated intention. “It relates to the 5th limb of yoga, pratyahara, concerning sense withdrawal, as well as the 6th limb, dharana, relating to concentration.” “Focus. Focus just on yourself.” Jess would remind us during difficult balancing poses, “Remember to breathe and look at your OWN drishti!” – as one of us trembles out of the pose, our gaze fights the natural instinct to follow. The moment my mind gives in to follow my eyes to anything but our inner focal point, I fall out of the pose with no control. There are bound to be moments and even seasons in life when we feel “lost”, not necessarily on what to do everyday, the inertia of being an employee, a daughter, a friend, a wife and or whatever role we have, just seems to be too strong a tide to swim against. And when the tidal wave of the external noises engulfs you, our sense of self is drowned out. And this is where I’d like to meditate on the very idea of having a Dristhi and applying that to my life on and off the mat. Now, having a mechanical visual fixation during asanas seems a lot more attainable than having a clear vision of who I want to be. But that is the purpose of yoga for me, even if it’s just for a glimpse of a moment, I get to experience the mundane turning into the divine and purposeful. Jane 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
The Observer, Observing, The Observed – Jane, RYT200
“Be the observer observing the observed. You are the observer and the observed.” There is an iridescent magic to learning the most profound wisdom in the most simple terms at the most simple moments. And Jess, our teacher, is truly a maestro at that. The journey within through the practice of yoga for me starts with the following : The body: take a look at your neck, wrists, palms, arms, elbows, shoulders, ribs, chest, spine, hips, thighs, knees, calves, shins, ankles and feet. Examine each body part, inspect it one by one and study them. – Is there hyperextension in my elbows and knees? Oh yes. – Were my shoulders rounding forward and my neck protruding? For sure. – Was I arching my lower back at all times? You just bet. The prana: learning how to breathe in Ujjayi for the first time, I was dizzy from all the oxygen rushing to my lungs at a much higher volume. But nevertheless, the forever optimist was feeling rather confident in her easy seated position. How very graceful you say? Nope! With eyes closed, I was leaning forward and my left shoulder was jerking up towards my ear. . The mind: focusing on one thought sounds like an easy enough task. Well, perhaps just before lunch time? But I have come to cherish and thoroughly enjoy starting our days together in Pramanaya. Some days my mind is calm, like a lake on a still autumn day. Some days my mind is restless with past memories fleeting by. Some days it daydreams. And some days, it gets lost in the comforting sound of Ocean Breath. For a split second, my surroundings blur and I embrace the self that is present. Time stands still yet it travels at lightspeed. When I open my eyes, I am exactly where I need to be, no matter where I started that morning. The emotions: it is natural to feel, we are all humans. The awe and deep gratitude I have towards my teachers and my batch friends, the momentary euphoria when I was able to get into a shoulder stand, the quiet yet powerful contentment during pranayama. But every day, behind my smiles, I felt shame. I felt weak and vulnerable when I was the only one left learning to stay in crow pose while all my friends are onto teddy bear pose and beyond. I felt inadequate and undeserving and one day, tears rolled down my cheeks silently as I lay down in Savasana. Then comes the wisdom: my ego is in the way of appreciating all the things I can do and how far I have already come. Every day I am humbled by the things I can’t do and in that, I practise non-attachment during all the asanas, the ones I can do and the ones I can’t do – free from arrogance and impetuosity. Above all, the most important observation is that the body, the prana, the mind and the wisdom are all a part of the yogic practice that removes the veil and ignorance separating me and the Self. The veil has no beginning but has an end. The Self, the very being that exists needs no practice, no knowledge, no healing. We are already pure, love and bliss. Jane 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
We All Have to Start Somewhere – Jane, RYT200
I had recently relocated to Singapore, and with 5 weeks of gardening leave in between jobs, it was obligatory to explore all ideas of how to enjoy one of life’s rarest events – “fun-employment” to the fullest. Perhaps an intensive language course, or solo-travel around South East Asia, or a YTT course? I almost gave up on the idea of doing YTT after calling at least 3 studios in Orchard enquiring about potential week day courses with no success. Just then, the Big Guy upstairs spoke “not so fast”. A Google Maps glitch led me to The Yoga Mandala just two weeks before the start of the Nov’22 Weekday batch (via a mishap of presenting the Yoga Mandala instead of the Mandala Club). Alexis had laid out the daily structure before day 1: 1 hour of Pranayama, 2 hours of drill and asanas, lunch followed by theory in the afternoon. But for a relative yoga newbie, I didn’t know what to expect. Frankly, my only thought was: wouldn’t it be nice to finally learn how to do the poses properly and stop wondering if I am doing it all wrong. And I’ve always been a nerd, so the idea of studying the theory of yoga sounded genuinely exciting. Spoiler alert, I was doing the asanas wrong, in fact they were so absurdly wrong that I bursted out laughing (rather hysterically) in downdog when Jess explained what we ought to be doing during our first class. But realising my downdog was more like a drowning dog was not the only thing I learnt about me, in fact, that doesn’t even make the top 10 list. So as I sit at Sarnies cafe just below The Yoga Mandala studio on the Monday morning of Week 4, please allow my self-indulgence in recounting just three things I learnt about me to end the blog: discipline. introversion and strength. Off to pranayama now – a new day and a new week had just begun. 🙂 Namaste, Jane 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
What your body tells – Reiko, RYT200
After we learnt about shoulder joints, I tried a few poses like puppy pose. I always felt discomfort around my shoulders in puppy pose but I didn’t know why. I thought it was just because of stiffness around my shoulders. I tried the way we learned : to retract the shoulder blades first, and to extend arms. I didn’t feel any discomfort any more. Another interesting session was about the spine. We could spot a lot of differences between right and left as well as individual body uniqueness. It is subtle and almost invisible in most cases. When you do Yoga, it suddenly becomes obvious. You find one side is easier than the other side. My body tells me how much time I spent working on my laptop (in not ideal posture), what kind of sports I used to do, how I walk and how I sleep. Reiko 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
Bring awareness – Reiko, RYT200
Learning is definitely fun. Many discoveries thrill you. It is not necessarily something new to you. You may have known it, but you were just not so aware of it. I used to use legs to bring them up for inversion poses. I was not using my core, especially around my ribs. I started to be more aware of my ribs (which had always been quiet and low-key to me.) At Pincha Mayurasana, it was eye-opening for me to think of opening my chest vertically as bringing my legs up. (I think I was unconsciously engaging my chest all the time to keep my forearms and elbows stable on the mat.) Bring awareness, bring a breakthrough. Reiko 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
Sequencing – Reiko, RYT200
This is something I wanted to learn from this course. In week 3 and week 4, each of us created a few sequences by ourselves. It was fun for me to make sequences. It was like connecting many dots of Asana to reach a peak pose. You can also choose a theme instead of peak pose, so you can use a bit of your creativity to come up with unique themes. When I work on sequencing, I look into each Asana more carefully. The way Jess taught us was well structured, and it makes me feel easy to apply it for actual lesson planning or self practise. Reiko 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
Invasion of Sanskrit Words – Reiko, RYT200
One day I was trying to memorize Asana names in Sanskrit. ‘Tadasana, mountain pose’ ‘Trikonasana, triagle pose’ Easy peasy. I know this. ‘Badda Utthita Parsvakonasana, extended side angle pose’ ‘Svarga Dvidasana, bird of paradise’ Ummm, let’s see…. I wonder what comes after these complicated ones. ‘Bharadvajasana 1, seated spinal twist..’ Bara..bara…it sounds like bara-chirashi. ‘Ardha Bheka Sarvangasana, half frog side shoulder stand’ Ummm, okay…enough for today. Let’s have a break. It’s time to prepare dinner. Then, I said to my husband: ‘I think I’m gonna make pasta Amatriciana for dinner. He replied me: ‘Pasta Amatriciana? What is that pose?’ Reiko 200 Hour Yoga Teacher Training Course Weekday’22
